The Norm and Simon's dinner.

Sets the scene

Char, Naomi, Lozza and Luke had been preparing and cooking curry for 19 people. Lozza didn't quite get the dishing out done properly and at the end there was no rice left for 2 people. So Lozza and Simon had curry and Nam bread with no rice. After The Norm has finished his dinner he decided to start cleaning the kitchen while others are still eating.

He picks up one of the youth's plates that has a few left overs on

The Norm: Si what do I do with the plates with left overs on?

Simon: Scape them into the bin.

Simon starts making someone a drink and The Norm continues scraping stuff in the bin.

Simon: Norm? Where is my plate of food that I left on the side?

The Norm: *looks up guiltily with the now scraped plate in his hand*

Simon: Norm, that was my dinner - it was a full plate that hadn't even been touched.

The Norm: I thought it looked like someone had left a lot but there was no rice on the plate.

Simon had to go with no dinner.

Later in the day. The Norm is speaking to Jamie.

The Norm: I feel so bad about chucking Simon's dinner in the bin, and I am really really sorry about it but *evil laugh* it was sooooo funny.

The Norm is a true professional when it comes to sport.

The Norm: Tennis is the hardest sport to become a professional in.

Lozza: I thought it would have been golf?

The Norm: Well, they're both the same they're both ladder sports, you have to climb the ladder in both the sports, you know what I mean, ladder sports. Yeah yeah they're ladder sports.

Simon: You're both wrong the hardest sport to be a professional in is tiddilywinks.

The Norm theory when scuba diving!

Sets the scene...

A small group of us were in Simon and Jane's front room chatting and watching an old James Bond movie that was on in the background. James Bond goes scuba diving without a wetsuit.

Lozza: Why isn't he wearing a wetsuit?

The Norm: Because it's the Caribbean.

Lozza: That shouldn't matter there is still dangerous stuff in the water that he should be protected from, plus it would be cold down there.

The Norm: No. The deeper you dive the warmer it is because you're getting closer to the centre of the earth. So no need for a wetsuit.

The Norm and Self Awareness

Tom: ... and Andy's got his sweat band on.

Andy: No I haven't.

*looks at wrist*

Yes I have.

The Norm and Celestrial Bodies

Night time.
Bright moon.

Andy: The sun is shinning really brightly.