The Norm's theory when it comes to Americans dating

The Norm: It's just like Americans isn't it?

Lozza: What is?

The Norm: Amercans... You know they just go up to people and chat. For example *Puts on BAAADDDD American accent*

"Hi there how are you doing?"
"Hi there I'm fine and how are you?"
"I'm fine to."
"good"
"good"
"you wana date me"
"yeah sure where shall we go"
"like to a restaurant"
"sure"

The Norm: so Loz is that how you get dates?

Lozza: NOOOOOOOO.

The Norm and The Gospel

For data protection reasons we have changed one of the names in this Normism to Spaz Mcgee.

Nigel: We should pray for the opporunities to share with Spaz Mcgee about our Christianity.

The Norm: Oh I talk to him all the time

*LOOOOOOONNNNGGG PAUSE*

The Norm: Not about God though!

The Norm and hair

Norm: Yeah. He's got a good style going on. Like with his hair and sunglasses.

Tom: Andy. He's bald.

The Norm and cash machines

Norm: I'm not sure if I can remember my PIN number...

Us: Well you can try it three times anyway and it won't take your card unless you get it wrong three times.

*The Norm goes off to the cash point to try his luck*

Norm: Yeah! I remembered my PIN number. At least I think it was mine. I hope I took out my money.

Us: What do you mean 'your money'?

Norm: You know like if I went into somebody elses account by mistake.

*pause*

Norm: You can't hack into to someone elses account can you?

Just for The Norm

The poem below is dedicated to The Norm.

You make us laugh nearly every day

You make us laugh in every possible way

We think you are a bright shining star

You are the best comedian we know by far

Don't ever stop being You

Because we just wouldn't know what to do..

Norm's theory on losing things...

Gem: Do you know where my mp3 player is?

Norm: No, why where is it?

Gem: (slowly) I don't know that's why I just asked you...

Norm: Oh... have you lost it?

Gem: (sarcastically) Noooo, I'm just asking you for no reason!

Norm: Well there's different kinds of lost isn't there

Gem: Eh!?

Norm: Y'know like you can lose something or you can like really lose something

Gem: ..... whatever

A step out of The Norm

According to The Norm's Solid Friends

The Norm way to play.

Timmay and The Norm were discussing worship songs.

The Norm: yeh, you just cant play what you just cant play.

Timmay: *thinks* how true!

Submitted to Lozza by Timmay.

Random but The Norm

The Norm: I'm fat thumb and I like chips.

Taken from a past youth church weekend away.

The Norm hearing things

The Norm is waiting for a lift...

The Norm suddenly gets up and leaves slamming the door...

10 seconds later, The Norm comes back inside the house...

"Was it me or did you hear a car beep?"